We're off to see the Wizard!

Dear Lord, I am so thankful that You love me unconditionally. 

Please chase away destructive thoughts that keep returning to 

take away my confidence in You and Your work in me. 

I want to rest in You and Your love.

TB2G-Amen

This is the prayer I MUST say every day as I continue my challenge with Pancreatic Cancer. 

It just couldn't be easy. That wouldn't fit with the story of my life. Nothing in life that is worth having is ever easy. It takes hard work, dedication & faith. Faith in yourself, in those you surround yourself with and faith in God.

I have learned not to assume ANYTHING! Especially when it comes to cancer. I assumed it was all behind me. I assumed I was in the elite group of Whipple & pancreatic cancer survivors. Well, I AM a survivor, with a twist. I have a little more of a challenge to go through. 

I am so very blessed to have a great Oncologist & facility filled with experts. I learned yesterday that not only is "the witch" back, but it is NOT a local recurrence, but it is metastatic. 

The Tumor Board met yesterday morning and upon reviewing my latest CT scan, one of Dr. Awesome's colleagues noticed a change to the peritoneum. It appears that I have 4-5 enlarged lymph nodes which is indicative of disease in the peritoneum along with the original area of suspicion, the surgical site. So, surgery and radiation are no longer options for me, but chemo is! Yay! I'll take "Life Saving Chemo" for $1,000, Alex! Oh look! It's "DOUBLE JEOPARDY"!!! I WIN! Well, not quite yet, but I will fight and I will win! Fortunately, there is no metastases to the liver or lungs and I have options in chemotherapy! That is something that wasn't heard with this cancer as little as 5 years ago.

After speaking with Dr. Awesome, I believe I am going to go the route of the clinical trial. I really do feel like I am in the Land of Oz and am traveling down the Yellow Brick Road. I know that I'm going to go through the woods and have to deal with the Wicked Witch of the West. I know that along this route, my family, friends & faith will, without a doubt, carry me through. This will NOT be easy, but I DO believe in miracles and I DO believe with faith, love & support, all things are possible. 

The clinical trial of choice is a randomized trial of Selumetinib (AZD6244) and MK2206, an Akt Inhibitor v. mFolfox. My Dr. Awesome is going to be keeping close tabs on me with my CA19-9. Yet another thing I'm blessed with in the world of Pancreatic Cancer, my tumor marker is sensitive and very indicative of disease. The other choice I have is to go straight to Folfox, but I'm going to try to help my Dr. Awesome and the Pancreatic  Cancer community and take part in this clinical trial. The only way we advance medicine is through clinical trials. Plus, I'm hoping that this may be the trial and the drugs that they say, "Stop the trial early! Every PDAC patient should be on this!" I've seen that with other trials in other disease states, so I'm hoping for a little Allycat positive mojo to work some magic! 

So, that's where we are tonight, my friends. I have a recurrence of pancreatic ductal adenocarcinoma with metastases to the peritoneum.

I will be starting chemotherapy next week. I will CONTINUE to work. Dr. Awesome agreed & believes it is best for me to continue working. I will be moving to Nashville because it just makes sense to be close to Vanderbilt & Dr. Awesome. Also, it will be easier to keep a regular schedule vs traveling every week for chemo. I am rallying some of my amazing friends & family in Louisville to pack, move & sell my house. 

Please keep Kyle & my family in your prayers, as they will need support as we travel the road of recurrence. While your at it, if you could throw in a good word for me too, it would be greatly appreciated. 

I'm not going to lie...I'm scared, but again, my gut is telling me, "You can beat this!" And I believe I can! 

Thank you for the love, support and prayers...

We're off to see the Wizard!